Coldness

I sit here with close eyes

With the coldness within me

I hear everything and listen to nothing.

The coldness within me is so cold

That it is freezing the emotions that I withhold in me.

I lack the sense of being

I lack the sense of love

Yes I have become someone that I am not!

I have learned to be hard and

Stone—like!

You have distorted me!

You have caused me to be someone that I am not

My laughter is gone

Within the coldness I have become a stranger to myself

There is no more

“Masti—Vershi” that use to live and dream

Now there is no one to understand me!

When I look in my heart

I see hate

And

I see disappointment

And

I see a girl who cries to be release!

And

I can’t release her!

Because you have locked her!

You have taken away her trust and sense of self

She is all alone with nothing but

Tears

That girl is not the one who was known for her innocent tricks

Tears have over taken “masti—vershi”

She lives in a world unknown to her

In the coldness

“Vershi” is lost!

Within the coldness a warm

Little girl is lost—and has become “Anjaani” stranger to all

Yes the coldness give by you have taken over

“masti—vershi”

dil ki aawaz

aapko dekhte hai tho dil darakh jata hai,

aur dil se ek aawazz aati hai

ki aapne hii pura kiya hai humara yeh jiwaan

bas laab pe dua aati hai kiii kushh rahe aap saada!

Masti--vershi

kabul hai judai!

dil jhhoom ne lagta hai, har pal aapko hi dekh ta hai
dekho na aaj bhi hum ghum hai aapki yaado mein
par jaante hai ki aap humare nahi
bas muskarake kabul karte hai ass judai ko!

Masti--Vershi

Wishpers

Whispers become Prayers

I whispered
I closed my eyes and folded my hands
Bowed my head, and move my lips.
No one heard the words coming out, and
No one heard the thoughts flowing through.
My whispers only remained mine.

I whispered to god,
I whispered for many things
I whispered to god for happiness
I whispered to him for his kindness
I only whispered¦without saying anything
I have learned to whispers but now I wish to pray.

I don't have the power to pray
I don't have the confidence to pray
But I do have the hope
I do have the will power to hope and whisper.

God I have whispered
Please try to understand my whisper
Consider my whispers as prayers
My whispers have become my feelings
So I'll always whisper to you and pray
For Happiness of my family and my friends.
My whispers have become my prayers that come from my soul!

Masti---Vershi

Because of you

I will not let you make the same mistakes that I did
I will not let you Cause your heart so much misery
I will not let you break the way I did,
I fell so hard
I've learned the hard way
To never let it get that far
Because of him
you never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of him
you learned to play on the safe side so you don't get hurt
Because of him
You find it hard to trust not only yourself, but everyone around you
Because of him
I am afraid
You will lose your way
And it's not too long before I point it out
You cannot cry
Because I know that weakness in your eyes
You are forced to fake
A smile, a laugh every day of your life
I watched you die
I heard you cry every night in your sleep
I was so close
You should have known to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now
I cry in the middle of the night
For the same damn thing
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you

Masti--Vershi
I am afraid
Because of you
Because of you

I have Changed so much!

I was a just born and she was Twenty,
Though we were two, we were one.
I would cry out and she would respond,
I would learn nothing but she never stopped teaching me.

I was surrounded by strangers eager to pull my cheek,
but they would vanish the as soon as I was wet and I would weep.
She would come running and hold me in her arms without any hesitation,
as though I had won the contest of some sort.

Now I was able to walk and chew,
guess what, I was two.
She and I were able understand one another,
I was her everything and she needed no one else but me.

I tried to walk but instead fell down,
the thought of her being with me,
took away the fear of pain.
We still could not talk that well,
But she understood my needs and wants so easily.

I could now move free,
because now I was three.
I was ready to join a new world,
my educational life was now going to unfold.

She dressed me as a princess,
but when I came back,
she needed minimum of an hour to rinse.
Now I was able to speak,
I was a plane and she was my runway.

How can I forget that child, whose shirt I ripped,
Guess what, I have turned four.
I now came home bite late,
and found her waiting at the gate.
She hugged me and took me in her arms,
it felt like flying through the sky.
Now we both did the homework together,
I would mess the home and she would do work.

Years have pass and now I turned fifteen,
and with each year I would forget to bend.
I didn’t care about what she said,
because now I have become bad.
She asked me to study for a better tomorrow,
but I was busy in a my own world.
Now I had many more others in my life.

I changed a lot in things she taught me,
She tried to hug me but I was out of her reach.
She still waited for me at the gate,
but I would look at her with almost the hate.
She would be awake until late night,
because I wasn't home, and I was in a fight.
She had so much to scold me about, but she never did say a word,
In the hope to find me better the next following day.
Time passed and now I am older,
still lost in my own world

Both of us now, had a distance between us
I left her for own my career.
But when I was young, for me, she sacrificed her NEEDS,
but I didn’t care, because now I have my own duty.
not only that I’m not with her, but I’m in different town
she is so old at the moment but I don't even sympathy for her in my heart.

I was not to be found when she needed me,
in the race of time I failed to see
Her pain, her hurt or her strife
In few years from now,
there will be someone new in my life.
At that point I fear I'll forget even to consider that,
I am her daughter and she is my Mother.
Glance at me, you will see a change in me
she remains the same waiting for me to come,
Looking forward for that hug, just that smile
But I have gone away ,away from her a few miles.


Mati--Vershi

Aazan

All I see is tiny hands, and feet

With very tiny pink lips

A smile with no teeth.

No words are said,

All you can hear is my voice

And

Yet there is a feeling of communication.

All covered in blue,

Only showing a face with

Small eyes and nose

Followed by a smile of this small thing.

When we come home all tired

Just a look at small things brings a smile on face.

The feeling of sadness is no longer there

The only feeling left brings a smile

The joy is the only thing one feels without any guilt.

There is no regret, no harsh feelings

There is only one single feeling left within the hearts

The feeling of joy

Something that most forget while living everyday life.

But this tiny thing has brought all the feelings to life

The pain when it he hurt

Joy when he smiles

Sorrow when he cries or feels uncomfortable

We care about it and it brings a smile on not only our face, but

He gives us the hope to live and dream.

He has become an angel that we all have been waiting for,

A perfect gift of god that makes everyone in our lives happy and full of life

We are now hoping and wishing only for him

The angel that has brought our worlds together with a smile.

We all are proud to be who we are

When we look at him we think that life is so perfect

And ask god for forgiveness and for the power to be thankful

All because of him we all have become

Thankful and Hopeful with our lives.

We pray not for self we pray for better tomorrow for him.

He is Aazan an angel with perfect smile and happiness

We all once again have started living

Aazan has made life much more livable.

Papa Ki Pari

Papa Ki Pari

Sochne se phele hi baat samajh jate hai
Magne se phele hi de dete hai.
Har pal mere sath rahete hai
Kabhi yeh nahi sochte ki mai ek ladki hue.

Har baat mai unki bas pyaar hota hai
Har din aur raat mere kushi ki dua karte hai
Ek woh jo sochte bhi nahi ki
Maine kya manga hai
Bas bolne ke phele hi dete hai

Ek rani ke taraha rakha hai,
Kabhi yeh essas nahi karwaya ki mai beti hue
Ek bête ki tarah rakha hai.
Na koi sawal na ko shikayat karte hai.

Mere asshue bhi aapne aakho mai le lete hai
Chot mujhe lagti hai aur taklif unne hota hai,
Ek beti ko bête se bhi baar kar rakha hai,
Har roz mai unne pareshan karti hue
Aur roz hi woh pareshan hote hai.

Kabhi uuf tak nahi nikalti hai unnke mue se
Bas dua karte rahete hai woh mere liye,
Aur kahte rahete hai ki tum pari ho
Aur bas uss dinse mai papa ki pari ban gayi.

Aur dua karti hue ki mai hamesha
Hi rahue papa ki pari
Aur dua hai ki meri kushiyo se unne bhi kushiya mile
Dua hi dua karte hai bas, papa ki dua ke hissa hi hue mai.

Unsure

Unsure

Nothing seems to be important,

Yet everything I think about seems to be of importance.

Strange feelings have come over me,

Every moment has become upsetting.

Nothing I do makes a difference,

Things use to be different.

But nothing remains the same,

Small things seem to make a big difference.

The difference is that things are upsetting me for no reason,

That makes life harder to live.

Still I try to live as if nothing has happened,

But small things come in middle to mess my everyday life.

Feelings of suspicious are uncontrollable,

They make life unsure and unwanted this makes me sad all the time.

This makes the entertainment boring,

And becomes a cause of the lacking energy in me.

The things that I’m unsure about

Take over the self esteem and bring me down even more.

At that point I have no clue about things,

And tears just roll down and I start to fall asleep.

This has been the time when I was unsure,

Every day I hope that there is less confusion and sense of lost.

The only thing that I can do I hope,

And hope for a better sense of self and self esteem.

I just wish to be sure and

Positive about the things that I do and see.

This brings me to a better sense of understanding,

And I understand how things can better.

Aanjaani

Bas khud se ajaani si hooN
Sapno ki duniya mai khoi si hooN!
Khud ko kese khojuN
Koi raasta bhi nazaar nahi aata!
Bas ek aisi khoj me khoi hui—ki
Sab rishto ko kho diya hai
Bas is anjaane tan mai taneha si hooN!
Par kya karu bas khud ko khoj rahi hooN
Aur aapne aap ko khoj rahi hooN!
Bas ek anjaani ko jaanne wali banana chahti hooN~
Bas khud se ajaani hooN!

Broken !!!

Broken!
Everyday becomes a century,
Every second becomes a day!
I have not known what waiting could mean
Until today, when I ve been waiting for you!

I always spoke of my feelings and my thought,
But today I’m the one who is unsure of them!
I was a person of life and joy,
And today I have become a walking death!

My feeling and thought, are lost
Hence I sit here with tears in my eyes wondering what to do!
I never thought I would be lost in a world of silence,
And would be dying for someone to hear!

When I look at the past, I start to cry,
The cry is of a person that wants to be released again!
I didn’t know I would ever wonder about being alone, but today
Is a day I’m alone!

I’m alone from heart,
Surrounded by the world and laughter!
Yet I feel alone and sad,
I look in mirror and I hate what I see!

I see a lost love, a lost friend, and a lost person
I was a person of people!
Now I’m nothing but a walking dead,
I look in mirror I see the person I trusted and now I see him mocking me for trusting him!

The trust is gone, the hope is gone, the friend is gone,
I’m left all alone to wonder!
All alone to live a life that was surrounded by the happiness…
All alone with a mocking person laughing and saying you have lost cause I have won!

The person says, first I took away my friendship from you,
Than the person you love---than his friendship from you and I have won the battle!
I try to be happy but nothing other then tears have come down the cheek and I’m left
As a broken person!

I see that person laughing at the weakness I’m feeling
I see that person as a winner, and myself
As nothing
Yes I’m left as a broken person!
Broken Person!


Vershi--Mastii